Some people have accused me of being an old man. I literally have no idea where they get that from, but a couple of years ago when I’d kicked off my slippers and sat down for the second semi-final of University Challenge, I had a realisation. I realised that I hated my settee.

Of course, as is de rigueur with us young folk, we rarely own the furniture that we grace with our pert behinds and it was the same with this sofa. Instead we put up with whatever fire hazards and eyesores the landlords feel they can legally get away with providing. Which means replacing or repairing them out of your own pocket is not an option.

One thing I did own, however, was an armchair that my grandad had “acquired” from the civil service (yeah, up yours the man) and that somehow made its way into my flat. It wasn’t a particularly fine piece of furniture but it was certainly more comfortable than the polyester-enveloped dustmite-harbouring piece of crap our landlady had left us.

So I set out to re-upholster it. I should specify at this point that it wasn’t a full upholstering job. The cover was knackered and needed replacing, some of the structural bits needed repairing and some padding needed adding.

Below are some photos of the work in progress and the finished item. In case you’re wondering, the fabric is from John Lewis – I never knew fabric cost that much money!

Now I still have no idea where this old-man reputation has come from. I just had a thought that maybe people will imagine me in this armchair drinking whiskey and recounting stories of the war.

But I don’t have time to think about all that nonsense. I’ve got last night’s Antiques Roadshow to watch.

Tally ho.

Go on, say it!

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